Antarik
आंतरिक
12” x 36”
Acrylic on Canvas
Antarik is internal, inner, domestic.
I began this piece when we were working on our Anahata (अनाहत) heart chakra at Kundalini Yoga. In Sanskrit, Anahata is pure, stainless – it means unstruck, unhurt, unbeaten. The twelve sounds associated with the temple of our heart embody the virtues of bliss, peace, harmony, love, understanding, empathy, clarity, purity, unity, compassion, forgiveness, and kindness. Our gurudevis stressed infusing action, communication and emotion with compassion from our heart chakra.
The more I meditated on this idea, the greater my struggle with this chakra. I found myself being deeply impatient with on myself as I watched my mind spinning in circles. That struggle spilled over in paint - to say I questioned and reexamined and re visited this piece is an understatement.
A friend joked the person restoring this piece in the future will be flummoxed by the layers on this one canvas. It morphed as I shrank and doubted. In the end, both the meditation series and the painting felt very much like peeking into things I usually keep under wraps.
As I painted this, I melted into an unusual peace. Asking my hyperactive mind to take a seat without fighting it, and allowing my senses and emotions to take over, led to the texture from the green knife work stripes. It was as if my long suppressed Anahata was breaking through its protective exoskeleton.
The greatest gift from this piece was a changed vernacular. It is always a revelation when someone looks at your work, and tells you how they receive it. I tried listening with open curiosity. That open curiosity took me down a road of deeper connection. I found myself learning new things about people who have blessed my life for eons. It sent me on a journey of discovery into the mind bending interiors of my intimates. I find that desire to peel away the veil with love and to explore that interior intimacy has stayed with me.